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Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Post 6: Do You Always Have to be in a Relationship?

I really don't know which is worse. A serial monogamist (ok, ok, a playboy monogamist). Or a girl with imaginary boyfriends. Do we measure our worth based on someone hanging onto our arm these days? Does a guy need a girlfriend for his friends to respect and envy him? Does a girl need a guy to call her own to feel lovable or special? Let's relate.

A few weeks back, a friend broke up with his gf of more than a year. Which was no surprise, really, for he is such a mega playboy. So I was basically, "Yea, whatever". But he said that "Bla..bla..bla..she is the one...I will wait for her...," and so on and so forth. And now, what I heard is that he already has a new gf. Which is, of course, no surprise. Again. I also can't bloody remember which girlfriend this is right now. Seven? Number eight? Why bother being in a relationship if you're not completely committed to it! You can't seriously be that sex-starved, right? And what about jumping from one relationship to another? Don't you need some time to get over the previous relationship and collect your thoughts? No wonder none of his relationships worked out so far. How can it when he doesn't know what he expects and wants from a relationship, from a partner? Oh, wait. I take that back. I've forgotten that all he wants now is to have fun, regardless of anyone's feelings (but his own, duh). And the best bit? He said that this new gf helps him get over the ex. Rebound. Right. Really helps speed up the healing process along. No?

A darling co-worker. Ah. And her infinite string of boyfriends. Which I bet are all fake anyway. Correction, we're ALL betting that he's fake. See, she's not from around here. She has no family here. Which obviously makes it easier for her to conjure up her dream guy. Who obviously only exists in her dreams. Well, I don't really talk to her much, only regarding work-related issues, since her manner so annoys me. But I've heard gossip, oh - sod it. I LOVE GOSSIP !! And word is that she had like, what, 26 bfs before? I mean WOW? And someone said, "Maybe she meant boy-friends!" Well she obviously meant for us to think of the other type. OMG, I'm such a bitch but here we go...

Of the "bfs" I did hear of was:

Boyfriend Number One - an accountant who "now" works in England. Apparently he "broke up" with her upon the phone call of his sister or something, who saw her dining with another guy. What I heard was that he called her up, from England, and broke off with her. *Laughs mirthlessly*
Boyfriend Number Two - is the son of a furniture shop owner in her hometown. Yep.

She's now on Boyfriend Number Three. She told A that he is "handsome and rich". Direct quote. Goodness. Which girl voluntarily goes around telling people that her bf is handsome and rich. And A was being very mean when she told me she thought "Handsome and rich, why want a girl like you, fat and dark?!" Ok. Looks does not matter. But really. I honestly don't think I'm pretty. Or even cute. And I'm not even thin. Not being a bitch or anything but she is way worse. Being objective: Me VS Her, on a scale of 1-10. 1 being least desirable, 10 being most desirable.

  • Height: 6 : 6       We're the same height, average for Asian girls
  • Weight: 3 : 1       I'm overweight. She's more so.
  • Skin Tone: 5 : 4  I'm a bit dark. She seems darker.
  • Eyes: 6 : 2          Probably my better feature, if not for the glasses. Hers are slanted slits, bit like a cat's
  • Nose: 5 : 4         Don't really like my nose, too big. Her's is pretty normal, if not a bit squashed.
  • Mouth: 5 : 2       Normal mouth. The sides of her mouth is always curved downwards
  • Hair: 4 : 6          Frizzy from styling products. Her's is long and straight. Probably her better feature.
  • Overall: 5 : 2     Overweight normal looking girl. Bit more overweight girl with a face which looks permanently displeased with something

Personality-wise, well the whole department hates her. So obviously you can't say that her personality shines through. Therefore it was totally justified for A to think what she thought.

As for myself, I put it this way. It's hard enough to find either a rich guy. Or a handsome guy. But rich and handsome? That's a rare species. And a rich and handsome guy interested in you? Goodness..even rarer. Wait, this bit gets better. He happens to be her brother-in-law's cousin! Who's father also owns a furniture shop in her hometown! (I expect she'd forgotten that she told people her previous bf's father owns a furniture shop, lol, and threw it in when I unexpectedly asked what he does).

And recently, she was supposed to go to his granny's big birthday shindig (and then she got sick - on purpose or not, don't ask me) so people were totally grilling her about it and asking her to bring back photos. And when she came back from her MC or whatever it was, A asked about the photos. She said "I couldn't go because I was sick. His dad was so angry I didn't go". That's so expected. Except the dad thing. Who can blame you for not showing up because you're too ill to?

Anyway, pre-party, before she got all "sick" she was talking about them hosting the event at some place huge, bringing in professional make-up people to do their faces and what-the-hecks. When asked to bring back pictures, she said, "Oh, I can't. I have to help serve the guests".

What? Some big expensive restaurant/hotel/wherever and you have to SERVE guests? Does that even make sense? Ok, even if you do serve guests, how can there not be a photo of you and the guy taken? At all?

Your verdict?

Having someone of the opposite sex on your arm doesn't make you any greater. Having someone else to stem the pain caused by another person will not get you anywhere. You don't gain anything jumping from relationship to relationship. Is there anything wrong with being single? Lying about a relationship you don't have, with a made up guy won't make us girls envy you. In fact, it undermines and degrades yourself. There's nothing wrong with being single.

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